~~Famous~~

 

Gracie and I have been doing some random TIKTOK videos and the response has been amazing!  It seems there are many who can relate to caring for a senior dog.  

One of the earlier videos brought a shocking 618.3 K views and 102.4 K likes with 3,474 comments so far!  

This one I am sharing with you today has 18.0 K views, 2,041 likes, and 95 comments.  

There are many others that have gained a lot of interest as well.  I was informed by one of Gracie's newer 'fans' that she is famous, and it does seem so.  HaHa!   Gracie is not impressed.  

I know there are many of you who do not have a TikTok account and therefore have trouble viewing the videos --- So I will try to share some on here.  After all, she loved you all FIRST.    

~Looking For My Girl~

Yesterday I went looking for my girl as I often do when she is outside wandering.  Sometimes she gets lost.  If you click on the above 'my girl' link, you will see what I mean.  I've started a TikTok account and I'm getting a lot of enjoyment from posting small videos and such.  Also, I find so many I love to watch and follow. 

Gracie is a full-time job these days.  She sleeps a lot, but she loves her walks, food, and cuddling too.  Sometimes she about pushes me out of bed when she insists on sleeping more beside me than at my feet.  Haha!  But.  It's all about making her comfortable these days.  

Our house is like a maze and a bit of a mess with all the carpeting and blankets padding areas where we want to make sure she doesn't run into/jump off of/ fall into etc. and hurt herself.

When she decides to sleep at the foot of the bed it makes for a good night's sleep for me.

If you watch the above video, you might notice that she had fallen into her poop and it was a mess on her butt.  A surprise bath followed.  She was not a happy camper.

But she did rest well afterward.

Hello Out There ~~from Gracie~~

 Tennis Courts?  Really?  Am I dreaming?

I'm not dreaming.  And I haven't even died and gone to heaven.  I might be crippled and depressed and half blind and deaf.  But I could see and smell that I was at the tennis courts.  ahhhhh....  Life is good.  Hard sometimes, but good. 

THIS IS THE HARD PART

 This is the hard part.  

The watching as she falls in her own bowel movements.  The watching as she staggers around, trying to find her way.  The watching her fall over and over again and when her little legs give out on her.  Watching and waiting.  

Last night I made my bed on the floor, hoping she'd snuggle up to my feet like she does in bed.  But she's a creature of habit, and once I closed the door to the bedroom, where she typically climbs the ramp to join us in bed,  her routine had been interrupted, and she refused to lay at my feet.  I couldn't leave the door opened for her to climb the ramp to bed, she barely makes it, then she falls going down.

She slept sweetly though, through the night.  Up and down a number of times, and outside to potty, and then fall, not able to get back up.  I did not sleep, hardly at all.  

This is the hard part.  Waiting, while she spends the day at the vet's office.  Waiting for him to examine her in between his scheduled surgeries, to evaluate, how shall we move forward from here?

Is her time with us to end now?  Will we continue to fight to keep her comfortable?  I pray for discernment, as I wait for the vet's call.  I will likely go with his professional opinion - what now?    

This is not a very good post, but I just wanted to write something.

This is the hard part.

This morning, on our way to the vet

A Day in The Life of a Senior Dog Mom

At 10 PM I begin the night shift.  This job requires, and/or is not limited to:  letting the dog out, bringing the dog in, watching that the dog is safe and does not wander into a corner and become lost, taking the dog out, bringing the dog back inside, moving my legs out of the way so the dog can sleep there when she wants to, cleaning up poop (in case I'm not pawed awake and she has no choice), cleaning up pee (same), taking the dog out, bringing the dog in, searching for the dog in the middle of the night to make sure I did not leave her out and fall asleep (haven't yet), making sure she does not fall off the bed, googling her issue of the day while trying to stay awake until I hear her bark to come back inside, cleaning up vomit, taking the dog out, bringing the dog in, etc. etc. etc. 

At 9:00 AM.  After coffee, God-time, and breakfast, I finish up my shift.  Kinda.  It takes 3 to 4 bags, and around the pool, I go looking for her night-time poops.  I examine them to make sure they are healthy-looking.  Then I dispose of them.  If worms are found, It's off to the vet we go for medications.  If her stool is funky-looking, I purpose to clean up her diet. 

Monday through Friday, 9 AM to 5PM, my job is not finished.  I need to monitor the dog.  If her eyes look weird and her head is tilted, it's time for another vet visit.  Note:  AC in the car does not stay cold after sitting for 2 1/2 hours in the hot sun.  (Covid restricts us from going inside)  So we wait.  Outside.  In the heat of the day.  When the AC wanes, it is my job to get the dog out of the car and take her to the nearby shade of a tree and don't forget the water.  Not for me, for her.  She needs to stay hydrated.  It's my job.  Oh, and I mustn't forget my debit card.  This one will be a whopper of an invoice.  It was.

Update:  After injections for some type of inner ear thing again, Gracie is doing much better.  She's hearing and seeing better, and her weird eyes look normal now.  She still needs her multiple outside visits from dusk till dawn, but, at least she can somewhat see me waving the flashlight for her to come in the right door.  

Today is a good day for her.  We never know though, what tomorrow may bring.  

#LoveMyDog

ON DEAF EARS

Dear Diary,

I think it's winter, but so far I haven't seen any of the white stuff like I saw last winter.  I'm A-OK with that.  Finding a place to pee can be hard when your up to your ears in snow.  I'd tell ya what Mom thinks of it --- 'cept I can't hear her anymore.  I know she's talking -- but what she's saying I do not know.  If she yells for me when I'm outside I ignore her.  But if she yells and motions with her hand for me to come in, I get the message.  

I was scared at first...  not being able to hear.  Sometimes Mom and Dad would leave me all alone and I would howl and bark for them to come home.  Mom!  Dad!  Come back!!
But I'm doing better now.  Sometimes I sleep and don't even know they're gone.

I'm adjusting to being almost deaf.  I think Mom and Dad are not though.  They are sad about it I think.  Mom likes to manipulate sweet talk me a lot of the time - and now it goes on deaf ears.  BOL!!  Get it?  Deaf ears!

But seriously -  I'm doing Ok for now.  Getting tons of attention! My eyesight is still good and there ain't nothing wrong with my smeller (thank You God!).  Oh, and I still love to eat.  and play.  and walk.  

I remember a word I used to hear my Mom say all the time.  Blessed.  I think it's something really good.  And I think I am that.  Blessed.  Gracie.

No Tears

 Have you ever buried your feelings so deep that you find yourself just going through the motions without showing emotion?  Well, if you have, then you know what I'm talking about.  Life, people, friends, family and goals just aren't measuring up to your expectations and things seem a little hopeless. But. No tears.

Our household has been lacking sleep lately due to a certain 15-year old cockapoo ....  yea, Gracie!  Up and down and in and out of the house all day and all night long.  Diarrhea  and vomiting.  Cleaning floors at 3AM.  Torn between feeling sorry for my girl Gracie and feeling sorry for myself. At this stage of her life,  I begin to think the worst.  Still.  No tears.

An emergency vet visit left my girl afraid, shaking and vomiting, waiting for almost an hour on the cold hospital floor for the vet to come back.  I watched her from the stool I sat on from above, cold, uncomfortable, emotionless and bitter to the fact that she was so sick.   My poor girl. But I stayed strong, cause there were still no tears.

But I knew of the possibilities and I trembled inside to think that this might be it for my Gracie.  And so I prayed.

Get down on the floor with her.

And so I did.

I kept praying.  Between being cold, sick and anxious, she was shaking badly.

Cover her with your coat.

 And so I did.  And I kissed her head and massaged her ears.

In that moment, as I let go of my strong matter-of-fact realistic, bitter demeanor and allowed myself to feel the hurt,  tears began streaming down my face.

"It's okay, girl.  Mommy's here..."

I felt better.  I'd released days of worry and exhaustion and confusion and now I was okay.  And so was Gracie.  Her blood test and x-ray showed nothing serious.  Probably a gastrointestinal flare-up from stress of the holidays.


Dear Diary,

Mom The NAG snagged this picture of me while I was resting and she shared it on Instagram and one of her friends offered condolences.  BOL!!!!!   I tell ya, I can still jump onto the highest chair in the living room and I can still poop and play and run and bark at the mailman.  #NotDeadYet

Gracie

 

Survival Mode

Many have taken to social media to list their favorite things about 2019.  What one word would you use to describe the passing of the year?

I think my word would be 'survival'.  That's kind of how I feel, like I survived it and now if I could just continue in survival mode 2020 would not look so scary.

This past year I've had to collect my thoughts and actions and regroup.  Ask myself, what's important in life?

I've given up on people who have given up on themselves.  I've drawn away (tried, anyway) from drama.  I've tried to take precaution when looking at the world around me and how others actions effect me. It's hard when those you care about choose a road that you are sure will lead to destruction.

I like the saying, "Let go and let God".  Easier said than done, but that's my goal.

Lately I'm lacking sleep, and my high blood pressure is returning after being good for so long.  It's kind of depressing.  Gracie has been night after night, unsettled and up and down and in and out of the house all night long.  Last night she was very sick with vomiting and diarrhea, so not only was I awake all night, but I was cleaning the floors as well.

I was successful in putting on my happy face for the Christmas chaos tho, but truly thankful to get it all cleaned up and put away when all was said and done.

A visit to the vet at the beginning of the week.  Gracie made friends with Emmitt, our vet's dog.  Who would have thought?  She's always hated black dogs.  Our vet says she is losing her hearing and we should get her a puppy.  Really?  A Puppy?  (Job security for him, maybe? LOL)

She might have picked up a bug of some kind at the vets office.  I'm hoping that's all it is.  I  would be so sad if it were more serious.  But she is 15 now, and when she gets sick like this, I think...  is this it?
*sigh*  I know, I need to stop thinking negative.

Hope you all had a good holiday and your 2020 started out awesome!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO GRACIE

When I got here, Mom laid down the rules.  No jumping on the furniture, and especially not the bed.  I'll admit, I played her like a fiddle and before ya knew it I was sleeping in the middle between her and dad.  

I was a Christmas present for Mom.  I've never heard anyone complain so much about a gift before in all my life.  It poops on the floor, she said.  It wakes me in the middle of the night, she said.  It pees on the rug, she said.  The list went on and on.

I had to keep sharp on my charming ways because some of my lesser, 

more disgusting habits were getting in the way of my peace there.

So when she insisted on ridiculous photo shoots,  I concurred.

I  grew out of my bad habits and Mom and Dad couldn't have loved me more! They actually made me CEO of the house/family and that is where I stand today.

And it's a good thing...  cause I count on them to lift me onto the furniture, and into bed at night.  I love my Mom and Dad and I'm pretty sure they love me too.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

15 YEARS OLD TODAY! 

PRINCESS GRACIE AND THE TERRIBLE HORRIBLE NO GOOD VERY BAD SPRING as told by Her Highness

I could make a long story short here, but I won't.  I wish for you to feel my pain understand what I've been going thru.

Several weeks ago it was a trip back to Dr. Fox for me with Otitis Media in the opposite ear as before.  I was one sick pup.  Mom and Dad are like...  what is causing this?  and Dr. Fox be like ...  how often are you bathing her?  And Dad and Mom are like...  could it be that she puts her head out the window when she is riding in the car?

BINGO!

The day my world changed.  

If I can't let my long furry ears flap in the wind as I'm smelling life passing by... there's no reason to live what's the sense in going anywhere?  Mom and Dad knew of my dilemma and so Mom got me a ear wrap AKA Happy Hoodie from something called Amazon.  Like in the rainforest?  I asked, but nah...  I don't think this torturous headpiece/ear protector came from the forest.  I think it was designed by a people who doesn't know dogs that well.  

I couldn't breath.  I was anxious and afraid.  I thought for sure this was it.  End of the line for me.  My last photo session would be that of a scared, miserable dying dog.

Luckily, it was a short trip just to try the thing out.  But by the time we made it home I was so anxious and afraid that I jumped out of the car twisting my knee! 

As I lay there on the road not able to move, Mom and Dad hovered over me looking very afraid.  Mom pulled the awful ear protector head band thingy from my head and I finally gained strength to limp off the road and into the house.

I would cry sometimes and Mom would cry too.  Next day it was back to see Dr. Fox.  He twisted me and turned me and pulled at my knee and then gave me a sharp pointy needle in the butt.  Twice.  

Maybe surgery, he said.  Or maybe I'd get better on my own. He gave me medicine that made me worse the first night.  Mom decided she'd just baby me and take me outside to enjoy nature and lift me when I needed lifted and see if time would heal.

I'm about 40% better, says Mom and Dad.  Dr. Fox says I'm pretty old for surgery and maybe we should wait-see.  Meanwhile Mom is lifting me into bed and onto the furniture and trying to make things as comfortable as possible. Dad has started doing a lot of the lifting because of Mom's back.  He's talking of taking me to camp again!  

Bunny Friend is taunting me outside.  Laughing at me and saying 'nah nah nah nah nah ya can't catch me'.  It's okay.  I pay him back by eating his poop later.

Mom hurt her back probably lifting me.  But she's getting a little better.  Dad helps a lot and he gives me belly and back rub therapy.

It's been a long spring.  And speaking of spring - Dr. Fox says to let me do what I feel like doing. a-hemmmm  ...  walking, playing, living life ...  

 So I'm getting a little spring to my step again.  I think Bunny Friend is rubbing off, cause I do more hopping than running.  

Mom said, this dog needs to go for her grooming appointment!  We've had to cancel too many times.  She stinks.  

Dr. Fox gave us the green light and so... yesterday was spa day.

 I did a big mushy poop in the yard after I came home from spa day at the Strawberry Dog, and then I sat in it yea, the MMP (Mushy Mound of Poop).  What's that all over your leg? Mom asks when I walk into the house...  and then she freaks out and chases me into the living room waving wet, soapy paper towels in the air.  After a good leg scrub she calmed down a bit.

Wish this picture had a scratch and sniff capability cause I smell wonderful..  Except for the right leg.  It'll pass.  But it lost something along the way...

Uncle Sam and Something Unusual

Spring is in the air.  I can see it.  I can feel it.  I can hear it.

Gracie and I have a lot on our minds these days.  I'll start first.

I'm considering cutting another day from my business 'hours' and only having the office opened from Monday through Wednesday.  All other days would be by appointment only.  

Tax time came and went for me...  and I was taken aback by the humungous chunk of my hard earned money that the government stole took requested from me this year.  It left me deflated in my desire to work hard.  Sad, but true.  

Don't get me wrong.  I love running my own business.  Being my own boss.  Doing things my way.  But I guess at my age slowing it down a bit is a positive and not a negative...  

My creativity and enthusiasm was interrupted by Uncle Sam's unfair demands this year.   I should be elated that my business was so prosperous that I needed to pay so much $$ in taxes.  But.  Instead it left me feeling like the guy in the recent viral video who was drug off the plane screaming because he thought he was being treated unfairly.  Ha!  I believe there is more to that story than meets the eye... but you get the picture.  

  I am feeling much better from the FLU or whatever it was that I had.  Still, there are tests being run but I am confident that all's well.  Hopeful might be a better word.  And what about you, Gracie?

Well.  I am loving the spring walks.  The fresh air.  The going outside every five minutes to check out the yard.  What I'm not loving is the beep beep beep of the carbon monoxide detector that malfunctioned and scared the bageebies out of me the other day.  Nor am I loving the fact that you keep wanting to clean my ears and check my belly for who-knows-what.  Nor am I loving the fact that you freaked out because you found something unusual on my belly that you think Dr. Fox needs to look at and now I have to go see him next week.  So.  good and bad.  But we will focus on making you a better mom, and skipping the ear checks and dr visits.  That would make life so-much-more-enjoyable.   If that's okay with you.  mom.  k?

Getting Older

Mom says:  "Gracie-girl you're getting old."

Her and Dad took me for a walk to a place called Cumberland canal yesterday.  It was the highlight of my day week year!  There were mountains to climb and valleys to trample and to discover.  A fresh warm breeze filled my snout with the most wonderful smells.  

And even though on the way down (in the Buick) I got stuck between the front and back seats because I discovered I can't jump around quite like I used to, I weathered that walk like a real pup adolescent dog   kind of-athletic cockapoo.   

Mom feels sad that I'm getting older.  I know, because she is always burying her face into my curly ear and whispering things like, "I love you, Gracie girl" and "My poor baby's getting older."

Sometimes she or dad will invite me to play and it's a lot easier to hide under the table with my toy  after I retrieve it than to try to wrestle them for it.     

Often my legs shake uncontrollably.  I don't even know why.  I have trouble jumping on the bed sometimes.  Dad is going to build me a ramp, he says.  I tell him...  "I thought I wasn't allowed on the bed??"  BOL!  Yea, right.  That was back when people ruled.  Now, cockapoos rule.  

Mom, this is embarrassing.  Don't show my friends the video of my shaking legs from yesterday!!!

Oh well.  Whatever.  

Hey, I still got some spunk left in me and even though I'm getting lots of lumps and bumps and arthritis and such...  I am still energetic, enthusiastic, and full of life.  Right after this nap....