THANKFUL

Thank you all for your kind comments following my last post.  I'm realizing that mornings just are not good for our Gracie-girl.  If she is not shaking, she is disoriented and it takes until well after lunch for her to get her bearings.  When she is like this, I put her harness on and lead her.  Otherwise she finds herself in a corner staring at the wall. 

Another thing.  We have surrounded our bed with tall suitcases, stands, etc. so she will not inadvertently jump (she actually tries to fly) off the bed in the middle of the night.  We've already put our bed on the floor for her, but still it is a little high for her.  Now though, she goes half way down the ramp and gets afraid, then tries jumping either over the side of the ramp or to the bottom.  Ugh.  Gracie, Gracie, Gracie!  Needless to say, I usually do not rest well as I continually worry for her.

I know.  I know.  I should have never let her sleep in our bed with us to begin with.  Well, that's water under the bridge.  I will be hard pressed to take that luxury from her at this point.   

Yesterday (Thanksgiving Day) she had a shaky morning.  When we put her in the car for a little outing, she shook terribly and I considered taking her back inside.  But, it was only a ten minute drive and by the time we got there and got her out of the car thankfully she had calmed.  She loved smelling a new area and of course she had to push a dime sized poop out.  Just enough to sit in and smear over her hind end.  Thankfully, I had napkins in my car.  But in cleaning her, that dime-sized poop managed to cover my bare hand.  Thankfully, I had some Clorox wipes in the car too.  Problem solved.  

So amidst the chaos I have my son texting me, "We are going to stop by" and my daughter texting me, "are you home yet?" and my other son whose car was broke down waiting for us to deliver his dinner.  So with one hand I held the  phone and tried reading the texts while with the other hand the poop was waiting for husband to get me one of the Clorox Wipes... meanwhile a big fat bee was contemplating hitching a ride since the passenger door was hanging open. I was thankful when husband swiped it away and he didn't swipe it onto me.

The day before Thanksgiving I had picked up take-out dinners from a great restaurant.  Thankful I did not have to cook.  They didn't charge me enough, so I asked them to re-check the price and then I paid more. Fifty dollars more.   Husband says - "something's wrong with you."  LOL.  He thinks I enjoy paying more.

The restaurant is a half-an-hour away.  When I got the dinners home, I was missing a salad, a dessert, and a gravy.  Maybe there is indeed something wrong with me.  Ha!

We had a good day yesterday and a full house.  Gracie, in her old age does not bark or try to intimidate guests anymore.  She just smells their hand and walks away.  

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!! SENDING LOVE!

I Think I'm Okay

I'm glad to have the holidays over and Christmas cleaned up.  Now to focus on what lies ahead.

On January 21 I'll go to Hagerstown to have my surgery.  I was hoping I wouldn't have to go out of town, but an hour away isn't too bad.  

I am such a baby about anything hospital- or medical related.  It could be from being coddled when I was little...  So many nights I can remember going into Mom and Dad's room saying I didn't feel well and I always ended up right in between them in bed.  I felt safe there, like nothing could ever harm me....  Now mom and dad are gone...  and the baby remains> lol.  

Or it could be from taking care of Mom for so many years before she died at age 69.  I knew if I took good care of her I'd have no regrets.  And I don't.  But I do have a lot of painful memories of all the bad stuff she had to go through.  Probably one of the worse times was after she had her heart attack and she was taken out of ICU and put in a room on 4th floor.  I was staying with her, sleeping in the recliner.  When she couldn't get her breath and they had to code her it scared me so badly.  

Then years later, days before she died when I was with her and she seemed okay and was talking to me...  and suddenly she got a terrified look in her eyes, then began shaking and having a grand mal seizure.  I was alone with her at the time.  I went running down the hall screaming for someone to help.  She never came to after that.  She had grand mal seizures about every 10 minutes for three days....  before she let go.  

I could go on and on about the many scares Mom gave me,  But I'd be writing all night.  Maybe that's why I'm terrified of hospitals, doctors, medicine and the dreaded 'being put to sleep'.  Yikes!!!  

But it will all be fine, I know that. 

It's a stupid lesion, no big deal....  (in a really nasty place) >  

But thank you, my blogging friends for your support.  I have found the sweetest, most genuine awesome bunch of people here in blogland...   

I left the doctors office in a sort of shock on that 10th day in November, then blogged about my unpleasant experience.  I was immediately comforted by Mildred who said she'd be praying for me.   Sharon made me smile and gave me words wisdom. She is such a strong person... I admire her gusto.  Melodie was there with comforting words...  and Betty and Liz were praying.  Jim told me not to start making up stories in my head as to what it might be.  How did he know that I was doing just that?  Just that simple sentence from him made me feel better!!  

In later posts many of my other new blogging friends chimed in with comforting, thoughtful, loving words.  

So let me see.  I have God.   I have a wonderful husband, cute & cuddly pup, awesome kids and grandkids, plenty of good God-filled friends, and a collection of the most outstanding friends I've met in blog-land...

And I'm going to get a two-week vacation from work.

  I think I'm okay.