Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Don't Try To Be Something You Are Not

Here I am.  All cutesy and lovely.  Just like mom aka the nag likes.  

Trouble is.  This is just not me.  

If God wanted me to be a dalmatian puppy he would have made me a dalmatian puppy.  


So anyhoooooooo  mom and dad the pack decided a joy ride in the Buick (last night) would be fun.  

I was tricked!  

I'd been to this Animal Prison/Hospital before!  

*Insert shaking back legs here* 

*****Shaking really really really bad!!****

 I was pleasantly surprised to find that not one peep there was interested in sticking anything up my butt or messing with my ears.

  Everyone was laughing and giving stuff away instead. 

 It was something called trick or treat night and all us pups got to visit each and every horrid jail cell examining room and the evil peeps technicians filled up our bags with treats.  

Ahh...  so that's where the treats came in... hence...the words  Trick or Treat.  BOL!

They gave us doggie treats made from peanut butter and cheese, chew treats that were yummy (and I never get at home), cookies, and toys.

I met up with my black cousin Opie and I didn't even try to rip his head off like I usually do.  It was all good. 

And now.  

Let me tell you where the REAL AND MOST AWESOMEST TRICK EVER came in.  The TRICK was on Mom and Dad who thought it cute/funny/awesome for me to pretend to be a dalmatian pup for the night.  

 "Wait!"  I said.  "That's trickery!  There's no way I'm going to pretend that I'm something I'm not!"  

And so.  Right before stepping out of the cold wet night and into the festivities of the hospital place...  I walked right out of the legs of that furry dalmation get up.  Mom had to sit on the wet ground and rescue me as I was trapped inside this 18 month old baby costume turned 11 year old dog costume.  

Geese!!  What an ordeal.  

And so.  We partied hardy at the Animal Hospital last night.  I smelled some butts and came face to face with some pretty scary lookin'  dudes and dudettes.  But I did it with dignity as Dad carried that horrid ball of cutesy costume in his one hand and my goodie bag in the other.  

And now... for the real TRICK!  

It was dark.  It was raining hard.  Dad had to park about a mile away.  He went to get the car and brought it to the door.  "Get in!"  He says.  

And that's when Mom noticed the poop hanging from my butt!!  BOL!!!!

  Have ya ever got so excited about it all that ya just let er rip?

  Well.  You get the picture then.  

Ahhhh, but it was a fun night.  And in the end I got a bag full of goodies and a sock monkey that squeaks.  

Life, it's about as good as it gets.

"Dear Sock Monkey:  You are NOT a monkey!  You are a sock!  Don't try to be something you're not!"