Friday, June 8, 2012

She's Gone

Remember my post from a few weeks ago, when Gary was reunited with his estranged daughter after one of the worst cases of parental alienation kept them apart for 6 years?

You might remember that 19 year old Athena was spending the summer with us?

Well...  let's see.  
She missed a lot in the past 6 years so there was 
some catching up to do.

The first week went well, 
and she met new family members.

I believe Rissi felt she knew Athena already from all of the old videos and pictures Pop-pop showed her.

They really hit it off.  

And father and daughter began to get to know 
one another again...  

But the past 6 years and the damage that was done somehow found it's way to the surface...  and we were forced to face some demons that had not yet been dealt with.

Then a change took place.  First she bleached her hair out.  Then she colored it bright pink.  The next morning she left a note... and she was gone.

She seemed to be in constant contact with her mom...  so I'm assuming that's where she went...  back home.  

Gary was devastated.  
He had anticipated an entire summer of making up
 for lost time.

And watching their garden grow...


  1. I'm so very sorry, what else can I say. So close, it is really a shame.

  2. I'm sorry. Keeping you all in my prayers.

  3. I know all too well that sometimes it's hard to leave the past in the past and not let it define the relationship in the present. But I know that you're continuing to have hope that it will happen, because it still can. Time does heal all wounds, and sometimes hope and time are what it takes. I have a feeling that she'll remember the good times she and Gary had and use them as a stepping stone towards a good relationship, and I know Gary will be there ready for that when she is.

  4. Oh Bobbi, I am sorry that this ended like it did! I pray that the fence will mend and that they will have more good times in the future! BIG HUGS

  5. oh my gosh what a blow, your poor husband, life can be so cruel sometimes, I suppose he will always have the days that were good and the ones that were not will become less hurtful as time passes, maybe.
    All summer was a long time, maybe, she'll come back for shorter visits, maybe she feels torn between her mom and her dad, wow, this is such sad news, I could feel your happiness in the previous post, I'm sorry it ended this way,

  6. I feel so bad for Gary. But I believe that even though her stay with you was short, she was deeply influenced by it. That will stay with her. She will know that her dad loves her, that she and Rissi became close, that you love her, and even little miss Gracie cared. An entire summer might have seemed endless to her, missing her friends, not feeling able to discuss this with you or Gary. She will not forget this time with you and while you may have to wait until she is really grown up I think she will eventually have a good relationship with her dad.

  7. Bobbi, What a shame she left so suddenly; I know that seeds of love and peace have been planted and maybe as she matures she will be back. My heart hurts for you and your hubby though. Praying she keeps in contact.
    Hugs, Noreen

  8. This reads like a lifetime movie. It makes me sad to know that a version of this story plays out in so many homes. When kids are used as a pawn to hurt the other parent no one is a winner. I feel so badly for Gary - of course he had hopes and expectations. *sigh I have a feeling Athena will be "in & out" of his life for many years. I'm thinking his hurt probably never goes away. I'm soooo sorry.

  9. I am so sad for Gary and for Athena. We have a similar experience in our family and there was much sorrow all around. Eventually my cousins realized what a good person their father was and how much he cared for them. I will keep Gary and Athena in my prayers and hope for a greater reconciliation.

  10. Sorry to hear this Bobbi and Gary, Considering what she's been through most of her young life, it is very admirable that she was able to to do this at all.
    It is a first step with many more ahead I am sure.
    Give her some time to come to some resolution of how she must feel...she is finding her way. ALl the best.

  11. Jim said it all...give her some time and pray for her. Gary needs some time be there for him and maybe someday the phone will ring again!!!

  12. She tried and that's what counts. HOLD onto to THAT. The hair changes were her way of exerting her independence. The memories she made with you all, especially her dad will linger there in her mind. And one day she'll come back. Unfortunately the lure of her past with her mom kept surfacing. Nothing you can do but bide your time and wait for her. TIME does heal all wounds. I pray she is safe with a roof over her head. I am so sorry your summer isn't going to be as planned. And mostly because of the relationship your hubby hoped to forge. Take care.

  13. Oh Bobbi, I am so sorry. I think she'll be back, it might not be this summer, it might not be for a few years, but I think she'll be back. She's still so young and still dealing with so much. I know you guys grieve about it and Gary is so sad about it, but I believe she enjoyed her time with you and when she matures and comes to her senses, she will realize so very much how much she is loved by you all and she will come back.... and that time she will stay......


  14. I am so sorry that she did not stay the whole summer. I hope that this isn't the end of her visits though and that she will want a relationship with her Dad in the future. Give her time. She is still really young.

  15. Oh no, I am so sorry she left. She is much younger than I had her pictured in my mind. I hope she is safe, where ever she is... and I hope she realizes someday that Gary did give her a chance and she was the one who didn't want to see it through.


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