My name is Gracie What-Is-Your-Problem Phillip. I bark at dogs walking their owners past my house. I jump for joy when the cookie carriers come to visit, often scaring them and almost knocking them over. I jaywalk. I lunge. I poop multiple times during my walks so that mom the nag has to stoop down and pick it up (because I like to hear her complain). I beat mom to the door whenever I hear the UPS truck outside and she has to push me back and squeeze out the door as I bark and lunge and try to get out to get him. I beg for food at dinner time. I look sad whenever I don't get my own way. I love to make the folks feel guilty.
I'm a bad dog.