Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Parental alienation is Child Abuse

Have I ever told you about my husband Gary?  I met him online,  ten-years in February.

It wasn't his good looks that won my heart at first.... . 

Nor was it that he sent me flowers  'just because'.

The truth is, I fell in love with him the day I met his children for the first time.  We met them at the Cracker Barrel for dinner.

see picture-books on table. 

Athena was happy to see her dad and fell into his arms, hugging him tightly. “Did you bring your picture books with you?” he asked. She nodded and pulled out a small photo album from a box full of others. She handed it to me and while everyone else ordered dinner I turned the pages of a year’s worth of memories, painstakingly put together by her dad; time spent together; photos with captions, movie tickets and other miscellaneous memorabilia. If he’d been trying to sell himself to me he may as well have slapped a sold sign in the middle of his forehead at that moment because it was then that I began to fall in love with this unique and wonderful man.

Throughout dinner Athena clung to him, holding his arm close to her small face and watching him in admiration, and when the time came to leave she wiped away tears and squeezed him like she’d never let him go. His older kids, Stacy and Jason, hugged us and we said goodbye.

Forward - --  Almost ten years. 

Parental Alienation.

Not many know about this form of child abuse. If it is not in you're back yard you may not even know it exists.

 My last memory of Athena is of her crying  and asking her father if she could come and live with us.  That was four years ago.  She was drugged, brainwashed, bribed and hypnotised in an effort to remove her father from her life and her heart.  

She's no longer in our lives. 


  1. That's just heartbreaking! Maybe in time she'll remember her fond memories and reconnect. :-(

  2. Very sad. I will keep them in my prayers.

  3. I'm so sorry. :-( I can't begin to imagine the heartbreak of your husband. I recall how hard it was, twice each year, when my husband had to take his son back to his mother, following his summer and Christmas visits. They'd both cry and cling to each other. He lived in another state, so that was as often as we could have him with us. No one is hurt worse by a divorce/severed relationship than the children of that family. :-(

  4. We live almost 4 hours away from Athena, and in another state as well. The distance didn't make the fight easy. Renna, I hope that you're husband's relationship with his son stayed strong. You are right, the children pay the price. It's so much better when the parents can work together to make things as easy as possible for the kids. My heart breaks for children who are torn between the two people they love the most....

  5. Also, thanks so much for your prayers!

  6. This happened to my husband with his son who had a tragic youth and died in 1992 at the age of 24. It gave me chills to read Athena's story -- I will pray for a good outcome for your family and Athena.--Inger

  7. Ooph! Right in the gut! Not the ending I expected. Hard to bear, too bad there is such a distance, not just in miles. So sorry....

  8. That is the saddest thing ever. I do hope that when she's older she will find you all & be apart of you again.xxxx

  9. Thanks so much for stopping by my blog! I can sympathize with you and what you, your husband, and his daughter have gone through. My Dear Hubby and I met online as well, nine years ago, and we had our share of courtroom battles over the children. It is so heartbreaking... I do hope and pray for you all that this can all be healed/repaired in time. God says with Him, all things are possible!

  10. my heart goes out to you and your family. i pray there is a happy ending to this story....

  11. I have heard of this before....truly an injustice in our 'system'.
    New to your blog....think I'll stick around for a while. Nice that you like the Queen Anne's Lace blog. Thanks.

  12. Parental alienation is a huge problem and Gary's story is similar to many other stories we hear every day from both Moms and Dads who are mourning the loss of children who unfairly taken from their lives.

    My thoughts and prayers go to Gary and his family and all the other families dealing with this destructive family dynamic. We will continue working to raise the visibility of this issue and educate parents, legal and mental health professions about parental alienation so other parents and children can hopefully avoid this kind of heartbreak.


    mike jeffries
    Author, A Family's Heartbreak: A Parent's Introduction to Parental Alienation


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