My Obsession

I tried it once.  It became an obsession; I needed to stop.  I went 5-years without it… but it was always in the back of my mind…. Taunting me….  Reminding me of its wonderful-ness.  Yesterday I caved.  I even planned my strategy knowing all the while that it was something I should stay away from. 

1. I blew off work. Closed the office. Went on my mission with one thing in mind. I would be fulfilled for the summer. 

2.  Oh, these extra pounds I've gained.  Darn them anyway.  So I chose my rest-stop purchase wisely.  

3.  This antique market was soothing to my soul as my mind ventured back to a simpler place and time.  But no... it was not the fulfillment of my mission.  Not at all. 

4.  Beautiful Deep Creek Lake...  and what a pleasant day it was!  Oh.  But, no.  That was not the obsessive desire that I've tried to separate myself from all these years.  I mean, really.  What harm can a lake be? 

5.  Ummm...  the museum with all the old mining relics of yesteryear and a bearskin rug?  Oh come on.  No harm there... just some good clean fun.

But then it was on to the real reason...  

I've known it was there all this time.  But I kept telling myself, "No!  You don't deserve it!  It will just make things worse!!"

6.  The Creamery on Deep Creek Lake is the most sinful and awesome ice cream I've ever tasted.  It used to be when I worked in Oakland, I'd treat myself every night on the way home.  "Oh, just one scoop," I'd say.  "And could you make that scoop half chocolate/half maple walnut?  And could you put the chocolate on the bottom please?"  (I like to save the best for last).  That was over five years and under 20 pounds ago.  Hmmm.

Ok.  I'll be good now.

  

A Dog With Attitude

Today Gracie has some attitude. 

Take It Easy

Recap of a Do-Nothing Weekend:

Weekends void of plans do not happen often.  This one I played by ear... left the chips fall where they may... did what I wanted when I wanted to.  Above, my beautiful Marissa stands clutching a handful of flowers to take home to her mommy after spending the night.  Ok.  So I played Barbies and watched Sponge Bob Friday night and Saturday till five.  The good news is I was able to organize all of Barbie's accessories i.e. shoes, purses, earrings, etc. while pretending to be going on a date with Prince Charming :) That's productive.

I did a quick yard sale on Saturday morning just up the street. Bought a Melissa and Doug easel for just $3 JUST LIKE NEW!

Said a quick prayer for rain.  It would be nice to be able to wear a little make-up again...  too Hot! Hot! Hot!

Sunday - first came the winds.  

  Looks like God was listening.  Of course He was.

Down came the rain.

And we had nothing to do. 

 Nothing but sit on the patio and savor the moment.

Not much was accomplished this weekend.  But I feel rested.

Missing: common sense. Reward if Found: self worth

I was watching the news the other night. A special report on poverty in our country.  I'm not sure what that magic number is...  the one that puts you into the poverty level.  The example they were showing on the news was a family of 14 sharing a 4 bedroom home, and family members having trouble finding consistent work. I don't mean to sound heartless....  but this house they lived in was a mess.  Trash was strewn over the porch and the indoors looked very 'unclean'.  The reporters did not mention anything about this.  My guess is, if the people are too lazy to clean their own house... and keep it up,  then maybe that is why they are not consistently working THUS the poverty ensues.  Just saying.  

I don't know about elsewhere...  but in our parts there is always help out there for the poor.  There are so many assistance programs for food, shelter and medical that make me think just maybe they are living a little better than I am...  those who are poor.  Don't get me wrong.  It's a good thing to help people less fortunate.  But there needs to be programs to rehabilitate and teach so that poverty does not become a way of life.  It can be beaten.  But it takes perseverance and determination.  In the end, self worth will take them places where they'd never dream they could be.  

 Note: I was one of seven children (five of us in the pic) and we grew up in a four room house. That's two bedrooms and an outhouse, thank you very much.   Mom worked in the sewing factory and Dad was an electrician at the Brick yard.  Mom and Dad put us to work cleaning the house, washing dishes and babysitting our siblings.  I know it's a different world today.  But for crying out loud....  can't we just pull a little wisdom from our past into today...  and become healthier and happier people...??!!  

Dethroned

Dear Diary,

Friday night the Cupcake came to stay all night.  Don't get me wrong.  This little cookie muncher is a constant source of food for me and for this I am grateful. But geesh...  the attention that is usually geared towards me goes directly to her.  

Not good.

My home transforms from a doggie day care with squeaky toys and balls lying around to a toys r us as castles, Barbie dolls, easels and large plastic vehicles miraculously appear from one end of the house to the other.

Our usual walks that consist of 'ahhh look at how Gracie poops' and 'Gracie is the best thing that ever happened to us' are now 'Oh Cupcake, you're adorable with your hair like that' and 'oh how she giggles when Poppop makes her car go fast'.  

And that beat-up version of a Volkswagon bug she rides in.  Could it be any noisier?

The kid loves me though.  And I love her incredibly wonderful cookie breath.

I guess I can put up with her for a day. 

As long as she goes home tomorrow.

Troubled but somewhat optimistic,  

Gracie

Over The Hill... or Is Life Just Getting Better?

I hate getting older.  Looking back on one’s life can bring a tear.  It’s over.  Yesterday.  Oh, don’t mind me.  I had one of those déjà vu moments coming home from the fair tonight.  I saw my son at 1…  his first time at the fair… with huge blue eyes gazing upon the bigness and brightness in wonder.  Wasn’t that just yesterday?  

Ok. So he was there with me tonight as well.  But isn’t he thirtyish now?  And isn’t that HIS SON laughing and wolfing down pizza and funnel cake as his big bright blue eyes dance with excitement?  

And isn’t that my daughter with her daughter as well? 

Oh, let’s not go there.  Let’s just enjoy the time.

These chic's were being welcomed into the world by me and a little girl as we waited for that last egg to hatch repeating over and over again.... "They're so cute!!"

God knew what he was doing when He blessed me with grandchildren.

Two of my favorite things.  

These ones were talking to Rissie... 

 and yes, she was talking back.

Santa?

Now that I'm older, I've become bolder. 

Yes. 

 I did get in trouble for taking a

 picture of Snake Woman.

I want to become an undercover reporter...  now that I've revealed Snake Woman's secret.  

Maybe getting older isn't as bad as I thought it would be.

Pancakes for Gracie

Does my granddaughter really believe that Gracie has a voice or is she just humoring my poor attempts at ventriloquism?   

Gracie (in deep dog-like voice): Marissa, I love you.

Rissie:  I love you too Gracie.

Gracie: Those pancakes sure do smell good.

Rissie (stuffing a silver-dollar pancake into her mouth): Do you want one?

Gracie: Yea!  Yea!! Pleaaaaassseee….

Rissie: Here you go Gracie….  (puts pancake to Gracie’s mouth).

 Five minutes later Rissie is walking down the hall towards her room when Gracie’s voice deep and clear causes her to stop in her tracks.

Gracie: Rissie, do you have any more of those pancakes?  I’m still hungry.

Rissie: Oh, yea Gracie.

(Rissie rushes over to her small table and takes a pancake and gives it to Gracie).

Gracie: Thank you.

Rissie:  You’re welcome Gracie.

Oops

This is an ear.  Okay.  It's a model of an ear.  

This is me contemplating whether or not I should call my last customer to find out if the tip of my otoscope is living inside his ear canal.

It's missing.

I need a new profession.

My Addiction

These days I’m totally addicted to the wildflowers that are sprouting up from spring’s seed dispersal earlier this year.  Every morning before heading out for work, Gracie and I take a walk around the house to see what’s new.  

I’ve never had a green thumb.  Plants and flowers are respectfully short-lived in my care.  

This one was particularly interesting at this stage and miraculously would turn to face the sun. *Gasp* Hence the name Sunflower, I suppose.  

It’s all been a learning experience for me.

I remember an African violet my mom nurtured for many years that I inherited when she died.  It was the most beautiful one I’d ever seen.  Three days after I owned it the thing started looking wilted, and then it began losing flowers and leaves.   A month later I'm certain mom rolled over in her grave as her labor of love met with empty Campbell soup cans and potato peels at the bottom of the garbage bag.

Wildflowers need little human care once planted.  God takes care of the rest.  Aren’t they beautiful?

Dear Diary... www.graciesdiaryamemoir.blogspot.com

Dear Diary,

Mom didn’t find my helping with the laundry today helpful or cute…  instead she scolded me and told me I was crazy for wanting to be

anywhere near a pile of hot clothes just out of the dryer in ninety degrees temperatures. 

But what she’s not putting into consideration is the fact that she has the central air on.  Hmmph. 

  But I'm in rebellion.  Mom say’s I should get off my furry butt and get to work on my book…  

But I have writers block.